Scientists Discover New Element

A major research institution has just announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has been named "Governmentium". Governmentium has one neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 224 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 311.

The 311 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes a reaction to take over 4 days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but, instead undergoes a re-organization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

In fact Governmentium mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of the moron promotion leads scientists to believe Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass". When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element which radiates just as much energy, since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

I can't stop laughing...

What happens when you Gizoogle conservative sites like Little Green Footballs or NRO's Krugman Watch? Oh, it's just too damn funny...

Shawty Green Footballs - Anti-Idizzles Heezeequarters

Don't forget to Registrizzle...

Third Time's Not A Chizzarm

I never would have guessed...

CNN:

Companies with ties to the White House among the first awarded reconstruction deals.

Should we really be surprised??

Are you kidding me?...

Yahoo News (exerpt):

Dems Assail White House on Katrina Effort
By JENNIFER LOVEN and DAVID ESPO:

At a news conference, Pelosi, D-Calif., said Bush's choice for head of theFederal Emergency Management Agency had 'absolutely no credentials.'

She related that she had urged Bush at the White House on Tuesday to fire Michael Brown.'

He said 'Why would I do that?'' Pelosi said.'' I said because of all that went wrong, of all that didn't go right last week.' And he said 'What didn't go right?''' Oblivious, in denial, dangerous,' she added."

...I mean...this guy just doesn't get it. HE DOESN'T FUCKING GET IT!

Memo to Anytown, USA: You're town is next. It could happen anywhere and at anytime....and you're president couldn't give a FUCK about you.

The Daily Reckoning:

A friend writes from New Orleans...

"... one of the greatest tragedies in the history of our nation has been visited on my little corner of the world."

Don't let the shrieking headlines fool you - the vast, vast majority of the people being affected by this disaster are good-hearted, hard-working people. The salt of the earth, as they say. A small number of hoodlums have tarnished the reputation of the greater, better whole, and this has only been made possible by the treasonous inaction, utter disregard and disdain of the federal authorities.

"Imagine if you spent a harrowing day or two trapped in an attic or, if you were lucky, baking on your roof, in 95 degree heat and 95% humidity. And this after losing everything you owned. Now you're corralled with hundreds of others on a hot street, and told to wait because buses, boats, food and water were on the way. One day passes. Then another. And nothing comes.

"In the meantime, people are literally dying around you. Bodies are floating by. Your children's cries are growing more faint. And, somewhere beyond your little hell, politicians are elbowing each other for face time in front of the cameras, figuratively standing on the bodies of your friends and loved ones to further their petty ambitions."

Responsibility...

Dan Rodricks
September 4, 2005

AFRIEND writes: "Poor, mostly black lives are not valued in America. The Katrina victims' plight is being played out for the world to see on CNN. The neglect, the incompetence, the slow motion to help are all an outrage. Our government looks very, very bad. I'm angry. You?"

I guess that's what I feel. I hope that's what I feel. I don't think I've become part of the ambivalent, eye-glazed, TV-doped masses yet.

But it's not just "our government" that deserves ire.

Who do you suppose is responsible for "our government"?

In 2004, the American people -- or a little more than half of those who took time to vote -- re-elected a president who got us into a costly war on an apparent lie, ran up huge budget deficits, gave tax breaks to the wealthiest Americans, dismissed the science that informs environmental policy and, relevant to the current matter of the New Orleans devastation, cut the Army Corps of Engineers' budget for flood control there.

And the Democrats have pretty much taken a nap through all of this. They don't appear to have the stomach for a fight any more.

In this age of expanding population, wealth and consumerism, neither Democrats nor Republicans will speak with truth and honesty about where we are and where we're headed as a nation. We're vigilant about terrorism, but not much else.

Conservation, shared sacrifice, saving money and borrowing less, living and working smarter? There is no clear, pronounced leadership on any of those fronts.

Smart men and women, once called to public service because they believed in working for the common good, have found other things to do in an age of diminishing government regulation, shrinking social services, extreme ideology and cynical politics.

Young people don't consider a career in public service because it's not held up, as it once was --by, for example, the Roosevelts (the Republican, and his Democratic fifth cousin) -- as something that can actually move mountains and improve lives.

So, with no real leadership, we cruise along in our SUVs at top speed, through the state of denial, as the national debt gets larger ($7.9 trillion, as of Sept. 1), the public infrastructure and social safety net weaken, the military is stretched to its limits, and the cost of energy goes through the roof.

In July, ExxonMobil announced a 32 percent increase in second-quarter profits, the third-largest jump in company history, while Americans were paying record-high prices at the gas pumps. There was no discernible outrage from elected leaders of either party.

And not even allegedly liberal Democrats will force automakers to build more fuel-efficient vehicles, or make public transportation, conservation measures and smart-growth land management matters of national urgency.

So, I look around at all this -- this monsoon of events we've been experiencing since 9/11/2001, along with everything else on or below the surface -- and I guess I'm angry.

But, as George Bernard Shaw put it, "Democracy is a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve."

It's time to wake up and to stop arguing on partisan grounds. Republicans and Democrats in Congress and the White House have all failed us in some way during this critical time in American history. The Republican president promised a war to end terrorism and nothing close to that has happened; in fact, the war in Iraq appears to have made the United States and its allies even more appealing targets for terrorists. The Democrats have been there, right along, barely uttering a peep of challenge to the president's war.

The war is costing the nation billions, so much so that money previously designated for domestic needs (such as the Army Corps of Engineers' plan for holding back Lake Pontchartrain) has had to be diverted to Iraq. And as the Congress and president abide the starving of the government's resources and its ability to serve human needs, where is the leadership to challenge them?

The Green Party? Howard Dean? Ralph Nader? Al Sharpton?

They all get dismissed as marginal, or fringe, or nutty.

But, at times like these, almost anything looks better than what we have in place. Relief for the Katrina victims -- and the next election -- can't come soon enough.

Copyright (c) 2005, The Baltimore Sun Get Sun home delivery

Dear Mr. Bush....

Friday, September 2nd, 2005

Dear Mr. Bush:

Any idea where all our helicopters are? It's Day 5 of Hurricane Katrina and thousands remain stranded in New Orleans and need to be airlifted. Where on earth could you have misplaced all our military choppers? Do you need help finding them? I once lost my car in a Sears parking lot. Man, was that a drag.

Also, any idea where all our national guard soldiers are? We could really use them right now for the type of thing they signed up to do like helping with national disasters. How come they weren't there to begin with?

Last Thursday I was in south Florida and sat outside while the eye of Hurricane Katrina passed over my head. It was only a Category 1 then but it was pretty nasty. Eleven people died and, as of today, there were still homes without power. That night the weatherman said this storm was on its way to New Orleans. That was Thursday! Did anybody tell you? I know you didn't want to interrupt your vacation and I know how you don't like to get bad news. Plus, you had fundraisers to go to and mothers of dead soldiers to ignore and smear. You sure showed her!

I especially like how, the day after the hurricane, instead of flying to Louisiana, you flew to San Diego to party with your business peeps. Don't let people criticize you for this -- after all, the hurricane was over and what the heck could you do, put your finger in the dike?

And don't listen to those who, in the coming days, will reveal how you specifically reduced the Army Corps of Engineers' budget for New Orleans this summer for the third year in a row. You just tell them that even if you hadn't cut the money to fix those levees, there weren't going to be any Army engineers to fix them anyway because you had a much more important construction job for them -- BUILDING DEMOCRACY IN IRAQ!

On Day 3, when you finally left your vacation home, I have to say I was moved by how you had your Air Force One pilot descend from the clouds as you flew over New Orleans so you could catch a quick look of the disaster. Hey, I know you couldn't stop and grab a bullhorn and stand on some rubble and act like a commander in chief. Been there done that.

There will be those who will try to politicize this tragedy and try to use it against you. Just have your people keep pointing that out. Respond to nothing. Even those pesky scientists who predicted this would happen because the water in the Gulf of Mexico is getting hotter and hotter making a storm like this inevitable. Ignore them and all their global warming Chicken Littles. There is nothing unusual about a hurricane that was so wide it would be like having one F-4 tornado that stretched from New York to Cleveland.

No, Mr. Bush, you just stay the course. It's not your fault that 30 percent of New Orleans lives in poverty or that tens of thousands had no transportation to get out of town. C'mon, they're black! I mean, it's not like this happened to Kennebunkport. Can you imagine leaving white people on their roofs for five days? Don't make me laugh! Race has nothing -- NOTHING -- to do with this!

You hang in there, Mr. Bush. Just try to find a few of our Army helicopters and send them there. Pretend the people of New Orleans and the Gulf Coast are near Tikrit.

Yours,
Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com
www.MichaelMoore.com